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05 June 2006 @ 12:29 am
I'm possibly feeling nostalgic tonight, for many reasons. I won't go into all of them, but every time a life changing event happens, we all sit back and take stock of our lives. I feel 10 years old again, ogling over a band that everyone called stupid but a select few of us. As we grew up, they grew with us, and now it's those 'parting times', where just like our high school friends, we see the good in the relationships we have, but feel sadness and depression and despair and loneliness when things go differently than planned or than expected.

I do feel 10, but I feel a longing in my 22 year old soul of my own dreams and hopes and aspirations. With that, I see my despair over a simple marriage as part of my 'growing up and over it' phase, but also what it says about my own current relationship. It's been almost five years since I found the one I want to be with, and while we have grown up, moved on together and done things our own way, there is still a part of me that feels cheated and a part of me that feels I missed out on something somewhere down the line.

I want to be married, and that is my piece of this whole situation. Being upset about someone else's engagement/marriage isn't about them, it's about my dismay at my life not turning out the same way. So while he sleeps here next to me, I'll finish off here and I guess go to bed even though I am not at all tired.

19 October 2005 @ 08:12 pm






This is going to be a great Christmas...

Cassie!! I need to get your Hard Drive, so I can install it... Does your gram have it?

31 August 2005 @ 10:42 am
My grandfather died today, or yesterday, we aren't sure of kidney failure. Noone even told us he was in the hospital. I hate my family for how unconnected they are and the fact that they don't care about that. Ugh just.. I do, I hate my family.


On a side note: GAS IS $2.89 IN NORTHEASTERN PENNSYLVANIA?!?!?! It went up like.. .40 cents since yesterday. o.O

On another side note - my burn is itching, which is a good sign :).. they are actually second degree burns.
31 August 2005 @ 12:47 am
I saw Erik Daniels today at work. He was up Barnes & Noble and stopped to say Hi to me around 9:00pm. We talked for a long while about nothing, he told me how his tour with the Army had gone. He missed two New Years, a Christmas and his 21st :( He was in a bunch of places, all to do with 'Mission: Iraqi Freedom', but he's safe and sound here. His batallion, 109th out of Kingston is getting split up in a month or two into batallion 228 FSB. He's in field artillery, cleaning weapons, etc, but wants to work with dechemicalization and warfare, etc. Anyhow.. There's a secret plan, but Sean, Sue, Erik and I are probably going to all go for a drink one of these days. God... catching up.

28 August 2005 @ 05:29 pm
So I have first-degree burns on my right forearm, and my back. I was TRYING to steam a wrinkled shirt this morning. I had work scheduled from 9am - 4pm, and my alarm never went off, so I was in a hurry. As I walked by the steamer, my leg caught the cord, and it tipped. The lid came off, doused me with steaming hot, boiling hot water down my arm and back, so here I am unable to move cas it hurts. Fuck.

17 August 2005 @ 01:08 am
Thank you sean, honey, for the paid account :)

i <3 u!

16 August 2005 @ 10:57 am
The band is headed back into the studio for the summer to work on their next studio album, tentatively scheduled for release in the spring of 2006.

15 August 2005 @ 04:23 pm
Oh Hanson, go screw yourselves

*ho hum*
08 August 2005 @ 01:36 am
For those who live in Luzerne & Lackawanna counties

There is a new magazine in our area called Manifest, and it is pretty much our only local source for literature. The magazine contains poems and stories from all local authors, whether known or not. I recently submitted two of my poems entitled 'Dried Memories' and 'Beethovens Last Song' to the magazine for possible inclusion in next months issue, which will be Volume 2, September 2005. Anyone is able to submit works to them as long as you read the rules and are a member of Luzerne or Lackawanna counties. You can pick up a copy of this mag at your local Waldenbooks, Barnes & Noble or Gallery Of Sound, to name a new. Check out their vendor list. Just letting everyone know, MAYBE I'll be in it next month :)

Here are the two poems I submitted:

copyright 2005 megan bradley

Dried Memories
November 20, 2001

He painted vibrantly
With long deep strokes
And a brush
So caked with ancient
Colors and maskings
Of last years masterpieces
Bristles once soft as hair
Now crinkled and shriveled
Like a rotting fruit forgotten
On a hot august day
A once-brown handle
Now a rainbow of colors
Each spotted and unstructured
Distinct, still changing
Each painting marking itself
Upon that brush
With its splashes and splatters
Of memories
Some light, fading away
As the chipped handle
Loses more innocence with
Each stroke
Some dark, like imprints
On the mind of the painter
Who looks at his brush
As though it were painting his life

Beethovens Last Song
February 25, 2004

Beethoven listened
With avert eyes
To the melodies he'd played
A thousand times before
Sweet rhythms he could feel
Beneath his fingertips

Knowing each note
- As though he had created it
The music poured out
Fingers deftly stroking age-old keys
Pausing to close sleep-deprived eyes
Each new note,
Threatening to capture the last
Unfrozen in time
Resurrected, remembered
And unable to keep up

At a feverish pace,
Old rhythms become new again
And the song which would
Play out in his head
As he fought solace in noise
For which he could not find
All was quiet, quiet again
Another pause
And one last long note
To end the last sad song
As eyes ceased to understand (or hear)
To follow what had failed him already
Fingers ceased to follow
And finally, for once, the noise began

Enjoy, Meg
07 August 2005 @ 11:21 pm
Just lay down and let your worries sleep
Don't think now, your world is dark and deep
Cause you know that I'll love you and never let go
And you know that I'll love you forever
I'll love you and never let go

Just cry out yeah I've cried those tears before
I can feel it now as your teardrops hit the floor
Cause you know that I'll love you and never let go
And you know that I'll love you forever
I'll love you and never let go
Yes I'll love you and never let go

You don't have to ask me do I love you
As I hold you it says how much I do
I'm yours until forever is through
Every time I stand for you
You know I lay my life down for you
I'll never let, not ever let go

Just lay down, put your worried thoughts to bed
As slumber pulls you down, on my shoulder rest your head
Cause you know that I'll love you and never let go
And you know that I'll love forever
I'll love you and never let go
Yes I'll love you and never let go
Never let go, never let go

I'll never let go, never let go
Current Mood: lethargiclethargic